Let me begin by saying "you’re welcome."

There’s no need to label me a hero. I created this life-changing site as public service. Even if you didn’t know anything was wrong with you, I can make it right. If at first you don’t get the desired effect, try sitting closer to your computer. If that fails, I recommend printing a few pages from the site, and sleeping with them under your pillow.

You may be asking yourself “how does this guy know so much?” That's a fair question, just don’t ask it again. My achievements speak for themselves, so I won’t bother listing them here. If you need more convincing, look at these pictures.

Take note of my special karate socks. Don't try this at home unless you have some. Contact me to place an order.

Privacy Policy

By visiting this site you hereby agree to the following conditions:

1. Any webcam connected to your computer may be remotely activated.

2. Any information obtained through your webcam will be sold to the highest bidder. This information will be sold to parties including (but not limited to): advertising agencies and convicted criminals who specialize in home invasions/anal-rape.

3. Corrections reserves the right to claim ownership of your soul following your 30-second free trial, which began when you arrived a few minutes ago